Monday, August 13, 2012

aug2012

i can't believe i haven't written in almost 2 years. something must be wrong. well, there's actually a lot wrong. so much has happened since aug 2010's mammo. a quick catch up i think is in order. i had my 4.5yr mammo aug 2011. i had my 1st real scare since 2006. the tech saw something and wanted to make sure, which i appreciate. she was very good about showing me the imgs as she took them, what she was looking at and all that. atcheson wanted to do an ultrasound JIC and i think i would've insisted if she hadn't. turns out it was just a fatty cyst kinda thing. i never had the 'why me' thoughts. and i never had the 'why didn't i' thoughts, which was good. i wondered if anything ever came up if i'd regret my choices. i was surprisingly at peace knowing what i would be in for, and i knew instantly how i would proceed. still, i was reduced to tears of nerves. and this was the 1st where i wasn't feeling dread before i went in! go figure. the remainder of the year was a bit of a challenge for me. quite emotional as i hit all those 5yr marks. 5 years since my 1st mammo, since biopsy, since diagnosis, since lumpectomy... my 5yr MRI was at swedish 1st hill. not sure what happened to the ppl who used to be at overlake, but no one was able to find them. but that was fine. i didn't mind going over to cap hill. it gave me a chance to have coffee with my friend shannon who works there (she's actually a breast surgeon). i found out swedish is a leader in the specs for the breast MRI machines. anyway, i had 2 complaints which i passed along to the tech and shannon both. 1 was they did not have heated robes! I KNOW!!! the other was there was no talkback for me to let the guys running the tests if there was a problem. they told me to 'lift me feet into the air' if i needed them to stop for any reason. easy enough to do as i'm laying on my tummy, but still. shannon found out who was reading that day and left a message for him to call me with the results that day. by the time i returned home there was a message from him letting me know everything was fine. next up was my 5yr with crossland, my onco. i got the high-five, pun intended. and in a couple weeks i have my next mammo. i actually logged into my blogs to start working on the food blog. i really need to get caught up or it'll never earn me any money. but a lot has happened this spring. all related to all the physical issues i've had over the years. the gals at group know, as do some mutual friends matt & i know, thanks to matt's talking. i've talked to 1 of my friends, but not 1 who really knows matt. and of course, our individual shrinks. which has led to the 2 of us seeking a couples person. i really don't have the energy to get into it all right now. but i know i will need to share and of course you'll be the 1st to hear it all. i'd still like to turn this into a book, but i've had so little support in that area, and as i have just realized i have missed almost a whole year of info to you, i wonder if i'd be able to do that anymore. i'll think about it. i wonder how much help it'd be anymore anyway, with technology advancing in leaps and bounds.